Mommy brain is real y’all

I thought I was forgetful when I had Sophia and then started work…I was wrong..since I had Zoe I feel like my brain is taking a wistful vacation in a magical world where I had so many helpers. Long story short, I am so so forgetful and scatterbrain these days. Some examples you say?

  1. The second time in the last two weeks that I get to the dry cleaners, I pay for the clothes, grab Zoe in the car seat and walk out..EMPTY HANDED..meanwhile someone is yelling ma’am the shirts, your least I got the baby
  2. Every time we take Sophia to school..we make it to the elevator and have to go back for some forgotten yellow pup (apparently stuffed toys are meltdown type of necessary)
  3. This Wednesday I made it to the pediatricians office 15 whole minutes early..except Zoe’s 4 month appointment is not till next week
  4. I had to stand in line at the cashier at least twice every shopping trip cos I had forgotten an item from a list I HAD WRITTEN is that even…
  5. Let us not even count how many coffees I have had to re-heat at home because I forgot to finish drinking it while working around the house.
  6. Today was the first day Sophia managed to take something for share day that was not already in the car or in my purse (hehehehe oops)

Good thing my head is attached to my body ūüôā

Ah who needs a brain anyway
Looking collected

MVP in baby gear (for Zoe)

Baby girl has been a little more challenging to soothe than our big girl. I totally thought since I have done this mommy thing before, it would be easier second time around. HAH good one Souraya. Anyway at almost 4 months, baby girl and I have got a pretty decent groove with a little help from our friends.

  1. The real MVPs here:

Now lets get real here, I don’t know what I would do without these two the last few months.

Zahi for picking us up as we fell apart daily


Everyone needs to get a Sophia because this kid is just amazing

2. Carry me momma:

Baby girl is a motion junkie and a snuggle fiend so this mama needed a little help carrying Zoe so I could bounce her till she calmed.¬†Baby K’Tan really got us through some tough moments there. We got to have dance parties instead of wailing. In fact it is so nursing friendly I can even do some simple things with both hands while feeding her sometimes.

3. Then came the baby carriage:

We have taken so many walks and so many trips since this little munchkin was born and boy is she fan of motion. We got the uppababy cruz when Sophia was born but I think we have already used it more in the last 4 months than in the 3 years with Sophia! Granted we live in a very walkable city and she was born in the summer and we got a little attachment for Sophia to stand on while we walked around town. Uppababy for the win. We also got the Mesa car seat that clips right on to the stroller base and that has been A+.


4. Domo Arigado Mr Iphono (Apps):

Yes I love that I can look things up as soon as I think of them, especially in the wee hours of the morning when baby girl won’t sleep and I’m on my nth hour of sleep deprivation. My search history is now all “how many ounces of milk does a 4 week old drink every 2 hours” etc. Well what’s even more helpful are some baby-centric mama apps. If nothing else but to remind me that other mamas struggle and that other babies who need a lot of work.

Top picks include: The Wonder weeks, Baby center, baby tracker, and sound sleeper. Also not a baby app but great for picture collages and comparisons are: pic stitch and pic collage


5. Swing low sweet chariot:

For my motion junkie baby, swings are bomb diggity. She has been a fan of three main ones:

4moms mamaroo, fisher price rock n play, and fisher price jungle swing. She usually lasts 30min at most, but that is 30min of rest for us and calm play for her.

The winner is Rock n Play:

But these are good too

There are some other amazing products but you know what, at this moment I am drawing a blank because both girls are asleep and my brain is on a small vacation.


This worn out mama

I kept hearing horror stories of how crazy things could be with two children. But hear I am unashamedly admitting in my own adult tantrum, I feel overwhelmed.

The crying. Baby girl cries at any hour in the 24 hours. She is not hungry. She is not hot. She is not cold. She has all her needs met. Maybe she is overtired. Gah who knows why. I would be nursing her (clearly she was hungry) suddenly she starts screaming in my ear. So loud I feel  am going deaf. I get up and bounce her around. Sometimes it is at 4am sometimes we are at the restaurant. And a little bit more of my strength and resolve is drained.

Big sister tried to make her happy with all the toys but baby girl just kept loosing it

The whining. Big girl is in a whiney phase. I cannot stand it after one phrase but if I say stop whining, it increases..then she gets upset and it escalates to a full on loud sobbing. Which wakes baby girl up and she starts crying. Now I want to cry.

Tantrum face

The waking ups.¬†Baby girl wakes me up every 2-3 hours at night. She wakes me up during day naps sometimes. Big girl wakes me up with whining/crying what feels like 5 minutes after I fell asleep from baby girl’s morning feed/freak out sessions. So by morning I am so sleepy I could cry. Monday to Thursday I drop big girl at school so I sometimes catch a nap with baby girl and I feel loads better. But today, both girls woke me up with crying like I was in a surround sound movie of baby tantrums. I really wanted to hide at that point. I actually screamed and hid under my pillow for 1 whole minute and counted just counted backwards and forwards.

The tag-teaming.¬†Sometimes they take turns demanding every ounce of me. Baby girls needs the bouncing and as soon as I put her down, big girl is yelling for help with potty time or with a puzzle. Then baby girl needs to eat. And big girl is just around the corner waiting for something else. My only respite is 9pm when they are both asleep at least till 1am. I do so love them and enjoy them. But by night I feel drained with the sleep deprivation, whining, crying, screaming, no’s, feeding, bouncing…

It doesn’t help that this week was as hard for my husband because he had a conference he left for two days in a whirlwind flight. He dealt with timezones and little sleep. He had to work extra this weekend and still he picked up the pieces as best as he could. Where is my village? Where is the extra set of helping hands?

I love my girls and cannot imagine being away from them for a day. But this week, I feel so tired and overwhelmed and I so desperately wish for that village women talk about. For that family member or friend who will just take the girls and give me a few hours to sleep, to stare blankly, to tell me this too will pass.

I feel like I am in the eye of the storm. And no end in sight yet. I know it won’t be so hard soon. I do have some amazing moment with each and with both. But this week, the challenges broke me a little.

And they go and do something so incredibly sweet

She won’t let me sit

Colic? High need baby? Feisty temperament?

Whatever it is, she won’t let me sit.

I bounce, I shake, I swing, I sway, and I walk when she is on me.

I rock her little crib. I push her stroller back and forth.

Sometimes each ‘action’ can soothe her for 5 min, and sometimes they can last for an hour or two.

But then in between the fussiness, she smiles, and I can go back to bouncing and shaking and swaying for hours to see the next smile again.


Bouncing around in the K’Tan…that is one tired face (mine)



Family of Four

My oh my it has been a while. Here I am now, mama of two littles. And it only took me almost two months to get my act together and start writing about it. Life is chaotic, fun, and beautiful, and just the way I like it.

This type of moment actually keeps happening..pinch me

Our newest addition Zoe is a fire cracker already. She is certainly keeps us on our toes and humbles us and checks our parenting skills. More of that soon…

Taken in a 5 minute period

My sweet big girl is in love with her baby sister, but also learning to adjust to having our attention shared with a sometimes loud and demanding little diva. In short, the kids will be alright.

Alright I do need that sleep before hunger startles baby girl into a panic (it escalates so quickly!)…zzzz


You know what is love? Attending a preschool dance/gymnastics recital

The past weekend, my parents came to town. It was so amazing to host them in our house, show them our daily life, daily things, friends, neighborhoods, and share a snippet of our life. Well it so happened they came when Sophia and her little friends put on a little dance/gymnastics recital.

If you are not a parent or dear friend of that child, you will likely feel tortured, bored, somewhat entertained by the mess, and just all together confused as to why someone would pay to watch this.

First act: One of the kids managed to tumble backwards…I am talking about the tumbling where you put your head on the mat and let your body roll forward in a ball, letting gravity pull you forward. Another kid rolled forward and knocked the kid in front dominoes.

Second act: Older it was slightly better…till one kid got stage fright and just stood there…turned around and ran into the coach.

Third act: tap dance by a couple of 3-4 year olds…need I say more!

Finally we got to Sophia’s group. My eyes welled up with joyful tears, my heart swelled with fierce pride, and the smile on my face could probably rival the joker in its width. There she was standing in the middle with her big curls and blue tutu, following the dance teacher’s instructions 70% of the time and looking just so darn cute. And I realize I could watch the dance recital 100 times just to see that again. Forget what I said about the kids being a hot mess…they are so darned cute and I wish they had another recital I had to sit through again soon.

6 more weeks till we meet baby girl

31 weeks pregnant and I really look big, from all angles! I mean some parts of me are still the same size as know like my ears, my fingers, and my toes. But yeah it feels like I grew everywhere. Here is a recap of the three trimesters so far:

First trimester (week 1-12): So much nausea, so tired, so miserable.

Hahaha I look great


Second trimester (week 13-27):  Still some nausea but some energy back, and fun travels

Belly popped pretty quickly in this pregnancy..and good hair days


Finally ‘glow’ replaced ‘nausea face’


Third trimester (week 28-39+): Nausea mostly gone, nerve pain and aches, prenatal yoga, bike riding, and all the NESTING muhahaha.

Look at my belly at 29 weeks ūüôā


Yay for fun travels and birthday treats


All the west coast things: Bike, yoga, and fresh baguettes


Yes I have a label maker and I am not afraid to use it


But really I have done a few things that have helped me so far in the last stretch:

  1. Started prenatal yoga…I could rave about this for hours..I love my yoga instructor and the class..I feel better physically, mentally, emotionally. Thank you Shana and Bhaktishop yoga (and thank you Zahi for pushing me to sign up).
  2. Started biking and walking a lot..that helped curb the weight gain and reduced the aches overall.
  3. Acupuncture: well granted it has only been one session..but I only panicked about the needles for a minute but I was fine
  4. Eating all the veggies and fruits.
  5. Magnesium, calcium, and zinc supplement for crampy legs.
  6. All the water I can possibly drink.
  7. I got the baby room and stuff ready…and really this has been so good for my mental state. I have baby girl’s clothes ready, her change station all set up, her portable crib in our room, car seat purchased, big sister Sophia prepared, my dear mom set to be here few days before delivery. Sigh of relief…I am ready for everything else now.

I just really miss lounging/laying on my tummy and I miss margaritas.

Baby girl, I cannot wait to meet you